It’s no secret that being a Mom introduces a whole new world of challenges. Even a whole new Universe of fascinating trials and tribulations and they don’t seem to disappear. As we feel we’ve overcome a challenge and grown to a new level, new challenges appear and they just keep evolving to a whole new level.
From the pregnancy pressures to the blessed baby days to the trying toddler years to the cherished childhood years; we always do our best with the knowledge, awareness and strength we have in the moment, even if we think we’re not. And somewhere between doing our best and the trials and tribulations, so often we feel the inadequacy of ourselves. And we beat ourselves up, judge ourselves, criticize our efforts and at the end of the day, we wonder where we’re going with all of this.
The truth is that Motherhood is part of our journey and there is so much we can learn from our own children. Our children are our mirrors and their behaviour mirrors exactly what we feel about and do to ourselves.
You see, deep within all of us is a child, longing for love and approval. And that child carries all the beliefs and knowledge which she has gained from your own childhood years, both healthy and unhealthy. And when we acknowledge and learn to love the child within us, something magical happens: we begin to understand and appreciate our own children’s actions. We begin to understand their feelings and the reason why they say and do the things they do. And that’s where our healing begins. And as we start healing our own inner child, our children start responding differently to us.
As a Mom of twin daughters and an elder daughter, I have often wondered why I was picked to raise these incredibly high energy children. They are energetic and adventurous with a love for life and fun. When I get stressed and frazzled, they join in on the fun and poke buttons in the middle of my brain which they know will get reactions out of me. And they know exactly what to do to get my emotions flowing. And that’s challenging.
When I discovered that I was ignoring my own child within and I was constantly criticizing myself, I started realizing why my children ignore me and disregard my feelings. And as I connected with my own inner child and started my own healing journey, my children started acknowledging me and my feelings and started listening to what I have to say. And I started seeing how incredibly amazing little humans they are, just as they are, even when they make mistakes.
So how do we find the love in Motherhood? Connect with your child within. Get to know her. Love her. Show her compassion. And understand why she feels the way she does. And as we do this, we begin to understand why our children do the things they do. And as we grow our love and acceptance for our own inner child, our love and acceptance shines through to our own children. And that’s an incredible gift to both them and yourself for life ~ Alison Livanos.